Why Valpak, Why?

Why oh why would you offer me a Bennigan’s Monte Cristo sandwich (or Monte Cristo panini? WTF?!) for $3.99? I’ve managed to not eat one of these artery-clogging monsters in at least six years. $3.99 Monte CristoWhy bring it up now at an almost irresistible price? What are you trying to do to me, Valpak? Why give me any additional enticement to enter a restaurant that sells something called “Death by Chocolate,” the only restaurant dish known to humans that allows one to augment and replenish its hard shell chocolate coating at the table? I think the answer is clear: you’re just evil. Evil, evil Valpak.

Bennigan’s Monte Cristo sandwich: $3.99
Having a heart attack at age 40: Priceless!

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