On My Monitor, the Markers Are Life-Size

This is perhaps the best use of a whiteboard ever. Also on BoingBoing. It wasn’t the intention, but this is a really nice summary of things you will simultaneously be incredibly tempted to say yet should probably never say in the presence of a whiteboard. Except number 21, which is almost always called for, in my conference-room experience. However, they left out one of the most important ones: dropping the F-bomb. Always drop the F-bomb. Fuckin’ A.

fuckstickAnd I’m really glad Sterling brought up whiteboards, because it’s a really nice segue to/incidence of synchronicity with this screen cap from the Daily Show the other day (okay, two months ago, I’m a DVR addict, what can I say?). I have no idea what was going on, and I only just happened to press pause on the DVR at the right moment, but this is what I captured. What do you supposed this guy did to piss off his coworkers so much?

And because it deserves to be Googleable and saved for all time, here’s the original whiteboard translated to text:

TOP 100 THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT SAY DURING (YOUR) REVIEW

1. Dunno
2. I was trying to think outside the box
3. I, kinda…sorta…wanted to…
4. You’re a dumb dumb
5. I love you?
6. Ummm…
7. I’m really interested in hybrid forms and deconstruction.
8. I’m not sure I want to be here (even though that is how you really feel)
9. But I’m soooo cute
9a. Awww…. I am sorry u feel that way
10. I was going to make it better but then I didn’t.
10b. The leprechaun told me it was good
11. I regret not going to (insert school name here)
12. But I like Avant Garde/Optima/Souvenir
13. What exactly do you mean by post modern?
13b. I’m going to kill you all!
14. I can’t think of a response.
15. What? Huh?
16. I’m not really into type
17. Is it design? I don’t know.
18. And what’s wrong with the 90s?????????
19. You’re not the boss of me.
19a. It was just a goofy piece!
20. Actually, I don’t really know what I’m doing (even if you really don’t know)
21. I call bullshit on that!
22. Whatever
23. Uh huh ok yeah.
24. Yeah right
25. I’m sorry, what was that?
26. Mom (whine)
26(2). (Because) I like it! Or Because I felt like it!
26b. My cat ate my printout.
27. My printer wasn’t working
28. Chill out! It’s only design
29. Yes I know I sound like a dumbass

One thought on “On My Monitor, the Markers Are Life-Size”

  1. and this is precisely why I don’t work in technology. anywhere that “but I’m soooo cute” isn’t allowed in a review is just ridiculous.

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